I’m starting to wonder why most of my cultural experiences stem from my yoga studio. But I guess that’s what happens when you become somewhat of a “project” for them….them trying to get you to shower….them praising your Thai 12-year-old-school-girl haircut…and them willing to sponsor you in the annual “Mae Sot Marathon” (just so long as you wear the Luckana Fitness T-shirt and win 1st place).
Now, not being to accustomed to sponsorship for my “athletic abilities”, I couldn’t turn this opportunity down. And might I clarify, that “marathon” is a term applied rather loosely here, and actually means 10km. So considering, I couldn’t say no.
With that, it was the night before the race, over a few too many glasses of wine, that I received a call from my sponsor.
Sponsor: Sawadee ka Brooke!
Me: Uh…hi? Who is this?
Sponsor: Luckana! From Luckana Fitness! We just want to make sure you’re ready to win the race tomorrow!
Me: (gulp gulp gulping wine)…Uh yeah! Totally ready! Been training in my head all night long!
Sponsor: Good to hear. All we need is your full name and birthday to register you for the race.
Me: Brooke Mackenzie. January 6, 1981.
Sponsor: Great! See you at 5:30 tomorrow morning, near the bridge, for the warm-up aerobics session.
Me: Warm-up aerobics session?
Sponsor: Yeah. You, along with Kathy (the other lucky sponsored foreigner) will lead the runners in aerobics for a few minutes before the race.
Me: Oh…yeah…riiiigght. Ok then. Five thirty it is!
Now, back to my wine, I start to wonder if I should put a cork in it and hit the sack. After all, what good would a night of drinking do for my peppiness during the 5am aerobics session? As I ponder the causal relationship between pinot and pep, the phone rings….my sponsor again.
Sponsor: Uh…Pi Brooke? Are you sure your birth date is 1981?
Me: Yeah…that’s one thing I’m pretty certain about.
Sponsor: Well, that would make you 29 years old.
Me: And the winner for the Captain Obvious Award goes to….okay didn’t really say that.
Me (really): Yup…that would. I don’t turn 30 for another couple of weeks.
Sponsor: So that means you’ll be running in the 18 – 29 age group rather than the 30 – 39.
Me: Yes…yes it does.
Sponsor: Well in that case…don’t worry about winning. You just have fun out there okay?
Me (thinking): Ooooohhhh! I get it. This 29 yr old can’t beat an 18 yr old. All your hopes and dreams of putting Luckana Fitness on the Mae Sot map for marathon champion 2010 swirling down the drain!
Me (really): Uh…okay…”fun” at 5:30 it is! Does this mean I don’t have to lead the aerobics session?
So in the battle between wine and winning, wine wins! And I keep drinking.
The wee hours of the next morning were kind of a blur (if you remember wine won the war last night)….
5:15 – Alarm goes off shockingly loud
5:30 – I am greeted by my cheery sponsor, swept to a “VIP” room off the side of the aerobics stage and presented with a pink and black XXXL (meaning XXXS) Luckana Fitness shirt.
5:45 – On stage, in front of hundreds of “marathoners” gyrating to techno-fied Thai pop music…otherwise known as “aerobics”
6:00 – Standing erect at the start line as the national anthem blares over loud speakers
6:15 – running
6:30 – running
6:45 – still running and starting to regret drinking the night before
7:00 - Definitely in a state of regret and still running
7:04 – Crossing the finish line, greeted by my sponsor and a local camera crew with huge smiles and two-thumbs up.
7:05 – With Kathy, being interviewed by Mae Sot local news station for winning the race. Sponsor and gang still thumbs-upping behind camera man.
7:15 – On podium accepting silver medal, alongside Kathy accepting gold, and receiving our trophies.
7:17 – “And first place go to Kathy from…” –sponsor grabbing microphone and screaming “LUCKANA FINTESS!!!!!”
7:19 – “And second place go to Blok (Thai pronunciation of Brooke) from….” –sponsor milking it for all it’s worth yet again and screaming “LUCKANA FITNESS!!!!”
7:25 – passed out in my bed, medal around my neck, wondering what the hell just happened, and getting a glimpse of what it must feel like to be an Olympic athlete...or at least a Mae Sot Marathoner.
